$2 Tuesdays at Pizza Joint

By Camille Johnson

Hey Y’all! I’m new to the blog Broke In Columbia, but I’ve been broke in Columbia for a good long while. Since becoming a self-dependent (i.e. no one’s helping me pay for all the fun stuff now…WAH!) adult, I am constantly on the hunt for fun things to do (and if I’m being honest, most of the time this means eating or drinking) that don’t take up too much of my meager teacher’s salary.

One of the best ways to turn around a long school day is by heading to Pizza Joint on Tuesdays.  Pizza Joint (3246 Forest Drive) has $2 pints and slices every. single. Tuesday.  Tuesdays are normally pretty packed from 7pm onward, but if you get in before then, there’s hardly any wait. Even after 7, it generally only takes 15 minutes or so before getting seated. The pizza might take a little bit,  just because of the sheer number of people in the restaurant, but the pints come out quick!

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Their specialty slices are the ones that are $2, and I have tried all of them, and they are all delicious. As in, so delicious that it normally takes everyone at the table 15 years* (actually seconds, but when you’re hungry it feels like years) to decide on what slices to get. There is a meat lover’s option, a vegetarian option, and everything in between. They are also extremely accommodating in taking off ingredients to make your slice exactly how you want it. These slices are HUGE, and about the size of two “normal” slices of pizza from other places, so one slice is typically enough (but let’s be serious, I’ve had two slices plenty of times, no judgment here!).

After choosing your slice, it’s time to choose your pint. There are typically between 16-25 beers to choose from, with everything from high-gravity beers to Woodchuck ciders. Certain beers (especially the high-gravity-can’t-believe-they-re-only-two-dollars-ones) run out quick, so it doesn’t hurt to get their early! The outdoor patio is awesome, especially for people watching, when the weather is nice, and the inside is has plenty of 6+ top tables in order for everyone from your work to be able to pack in at one table after a long day of work. The staff is super fast-moving but always friendly!

pj2

Need to unwind from an awful Tuesday (the worst day of the week in my opinion, it’s SO far from the weekend!) and celebrate that you’ve almost made it to Hump Day? Meet me at Pizza Joint. First round’s on me. (Don’t get too excited, I can only do that when your first round is only costing me $2!)

Ode to Broke

By Frank Thompson

It’s almost here! That day sublime
which brings the start of summer-time!
What shall we see? What will we do?
Let’s go to Europe! Whoop-de-doo!
Or perhaps we should decide
to rent a lovely house beside
the ocean blue and spend our days
in cold libations’ lovely haze.
Cross-country drive? A sailing spree?
They all sound peachy keen to me!
There’s just one problem (hear me well).
We’re stuck right here and broke as hell.
Let’s face it, friends, some can’t afford
to visit Alp, resort, or fijord.
(We’d love to mix with Eurotrash
but simply lack the piles of cash.)
Fear not, however, gentle friend!
The options truly never end
for one whose spending money springs
from selling off unwanted things,
walking house pets, selling plasma,
or trying some new drug for asthma
in laboratory tests extensive
(if they use mice it’s more expensive).
Just look around and you will see
a ton of things to do for free!
The trick to making them inviting
is changing what you find exciting.
No boring trip to France for me,
it’s off to the court house, hee hee hee!
See the people filing things!
Hear the ancient printer dings!
How could you ever have the blues
observing folks in hard-soled shoes
up to such outrageous capers
as climbing stairs and holding papers?
Next up, the grocery store is there
to entertain (and slightly scare)
with all the types of odd and neat
who share one trait – they all must eat.
Just make a lap through Kroger’s lot –
I guarantee you you will spot
all sorts of things! You won’t be sorry!
It’s like a stay-in-town safari!
Look there! A bald-topped elder-walker!
A warbling wobbling boyfriend-stalker!
A cell-phone-shouter in the wild
(who truly needs to chain her child)
bleats out her call for all to hear
on who she thinks is likely queer.
She sings of who is poor and rich,
who’s a luv and who’s a bitch,
her friends, her foes, her weekend’s plan,
and how she’s got to dump her man.
(Then watch her force a painful smile
when as she goes to turn the aisle
her cart comes bumping, almost crashing
into the person she’d been trashing.)

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Onward, onward! More to do!
How’s a snack sound? Good to you?
Off to the Red Cross, where, you see,
they give you Oreos for free!
To go with that? (Oh, turn me loose!)
Some apple, grape, or orange juice
which alternate in sweet rotation.
(One pint of blood, required donation.)

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The thrills don’t stop! Life’s lively tune
plays on throughout the afternoon!
Watching people stand in lines
to pay their ancient traffic fines!

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Relaxing in a quiet spot
observing folks you’re glad you’re not,
like obese grandma in a thong
at Target. (Jesus, that’s just wrong.)
The world is here, with thrills to serve,
free treats to munch, sights to observe.
All this and more awaits us now,
yet reader, you may question how
one cultivates this type of thinking.
(I recommend you start with drinking.)

Going Off the Sauce

By Jillian Owens

When I read my fellow BIC contributor Marques Moore’s article, “Don’t Drink!  Don’t Smoke!  What DO You Do…?“, it made me think a bit.

I love booze.  Booze is amazing and wonderful and has an uncanny way of making most things better.  Boring date?  Try booze!  Awkward situation?  Just add booze!  Have an afternoon to kill?  Why not meet up with friends and consume some booze?

I like small kylixes and I can not lie.
I like small kylixes and I can not lie.

I drink just about every day.  A glass of wine after work here, a cocktail there, and in significantly greater quantities over the weekend.  I’ll sip a glass of pinot while I sew.  If I’m stuck and can’t come up with a story idea, I’ll drink a tasty cider to loosen up my creativity.

Saturdays begin with a ritualistic mimosa at Wine Down on Main after checking out Soda City Market, followed by the Giant Wine Sale & Tasting at Cellar on Greene.

On one such Saturday, I turned to my friend and asked, “Do we have a problem?”

“No.  No!”  My friend was taken aback.” Yes…we like to drink.  But it doesn’t affect our lives in any negative way.  We go to work, we do things, and you’re one of the most productive people I know.  I don’t know how you’d function without alcohol.  And why would you want to?”

Booze makes moments better!
Booze makes moments better!

I love booze.  I love how fantastic things have happened whilst consuming said booze.

I don’t love how on occasion booze can lead me to some fantastically bad decisions, like angry texting, attempting to dance, making out with some weird stranger, or singing show tunes at karaoke.

Only booze understands me.
Erin looks on disapprovingly…

I also don’t love the idea of needing a substance to function.  I don’t like seeing a suspicious link to my creativity and my alcohol consumption.  When does a pleasant ritual become something more insidious?

“I’m giving up drinking for a couple of weeks,” I told my friend

“Why?  Are you pregnant?!?” was her fair response (this is the only reason our female friends have gone off the sauce, so we’re quite suspicious now).

“No.  Gross!  God no.  I just want to see what it’s like.  I want to test myself.”

I want to see what will happen.  I want to see if clever fun Jillian can still be clever and fun without a cocktail in her.  I want to see if this change makes me more productive.  I want to see what a totally non-hungover Sunday feels like.

I talked to Marques about this, and will probably continue to do so throughout this two week trial.

“This is going to suck.  I’m going to hate this,” I moaned.

Marques just shrugged, “I think you’re going to be surprised by how not a big deal it is.  You can still go out and do stuff.  You’re still going to hang out with your friends and have a social life.  You don’t have to do this, you know.”

We'll see...
We’ll see…

But I feel like I do.

It all starts Monday.

Will I make it through the next two weeks?  I really don’t know.

I’ll keep you posted.